The One Where Chandler Can't Cry

Thursday, 10 February 2000

On Valentine's week Rachel makes Ross break off his date with her sister Jill, Jill retaliates by kissing him, and the friends discover a porn actress is trading on Phoebe's name while Chandler admits he cannot cry.

What happens

• Ross tells Rachel that nothing happened with Jill beyond a slideshow of his fossils, and that Jill has asked him out again for Valentine's Day.
• Rachel says she cannot handle Ross dating her sister, and Ross agrees to phone Jill immediately and call it off.
• Watching a film with the others, Chandler admits he never cries at anything, not even a photo of the parents' day his own parents skipped, and Joey pronounces him emotionally dead.
• Rachel confesses to Jill that she is the reason Ross cancelled, and Jill accuses her of jealousy and storms off.
• Joey brings home a pornographic tape credited to Phoebe Buffay, and Rachel spots an ankle tattoo proving the performer is Ursula, just as Phoebe walks in.
• Chandler reads a book of sentimental stories hoping to force out a tear, and Monica loses her temper when he stays dry through her invented deathbed scenario.
• Phoebe confronts Ursula mid-shoot, turns down her offer of thirty dollars for twin scenes, and orders her to stop using her name.
• Jill arrives at Ross's apartment for another slideshow and kisses him after Rachel phones to warn him he is being used.
• Ross tells Rachel he stopped the kiss because anything with Jill would rule out ever getting back together with her, and Rachel thanks him.
• Chandler finally breaks down in tears over Ross and Rachel, then cries again when Jill leaves for good.